Hide the cheese

Anita's Apple Crisp

There are some days when you just need to wallow in it. There are days when the loss or grief that is lurking right under the surface needs to be let out. Normally, you keep it together, moving through the day, talking, doing, even laughing. But it is there. Always.

Maybe you tell someone. Maybe it's a friend or maybe it's someone you barely know who asks you how you are. And you really tell her. Surprise! But instead of running in the other direction, she nods and tells you that she too is carrying a loss. And you cry, but still, acknowledging the hurt feels better than always trying to forget it.

And you realize how many people are walking around with those holes. They are all out there, people who are missing and hurting and wondering how this could have happened.

Some days, you just need to wallow. You hand the kids off to a spouse, you take them to a neighbor, or you lock yourself in the bathroom for a few minutes. Or, maybe, if they are old enough, you tell them that you are sad and that you need some time to sit still.

Then you let yourself feel that sadness, that loss. You think about her and remember her, the conversations you had, her smile, her laugh.

You remember his voice and how he looked when he talked about something he loved. You remember the first time you met and the first time you had a real conversation. You remember a joke he told and an expression that he loved to use.

You remember what it felt like to be with her, how you felt. You walk through those memories, and even though it hurts, you revel in being with her again.

Then you unlock the door, dry your tears, and walk back to join those who are still here. You make something delicious and sit together to eat. Or you talk. Or walk. Or you play a game or read a book.

And even though that hole is still there, you are okay.

2009: Banana Chocolate Chip Snack Cakes (my first recipe ever!)
2010: Robin's Egg Meringues
2011: Molasses Cookies
2012: Mom's Apple Butter

Anita's Apple Crisp

Serves 8
20 minutes preparation time
40-45 minutes baking time

1/2 cup rolled oats
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup unbleached all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
pinch of salt
4 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into several small pieces
2 pounds apples (6 medium), peeled, cored, and diced
1 tablespoon freshly squeezed lemon juice
2 tablespoons granulated sugar

vanilla ice cream for serving

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Measure the oats, brown sugar, flour, cinnamon, and salt into a small bowl. Stir them together with a fork. Add the butter and work it into the dry ingredients with your fingers until the mixture looks moist and there are no longer any apparent lumps of butter. Set aside.

Arrange the apples in a 2-quart baking dish. Add the lemon juice and stir. Sprinkle the sugar on top of the apples and stir again. Sprinkle the oat mixture evenly over the apples.

Bake until the the apples are completely soft and the topping is brown and crisp, 40 to 45 minutes.

Serve warm with vanilla ice cream.

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Roasted Cauliflower and Turnip Soup with Crispy Turnip Leaves

Driving home from the inauguration yesterday, our three kids were in the back of the car, waving their flags, giggling, cracking jokes. Limbs were sprawled over each other and heads lolled onto shoulders. It was rowdy and raucous. Listening to them, I was heartened by their togetherness and their ability to make each other laugh.

But I was also nervous that someone would go too far and cross that line that had been crossed before and before and before. Those squeals of delight would turn into accusations and the mood would be broken.

We made it home, though, and after Gabe and I went into the house, the children stayed shoe-horned into the back of the car, talking together about who-knows-what.

It was a metaphor for the day, that togetherness.

Unity. United States. United We Stand.

When we are at our best in our non-political lives, we rely on that unity in good and bad times. Communities pull together when tragedy falls. Neighbors dig each other out of snowstorms. Families gather together around the table. In happy times, unity is cause for celebration; in difficult ones, it sustains us.

And for a day -- even in Washington -- unity was the theme. I was swept up in it and optimistic that if we pull together in our communities and as a country, we can overcome the seemingly insurmountable challenges that we face today.

At least for now, I'm feeling the promise that unity can bring. We are in this together.

Richard Blanco's "One Today" said it so eloquently, ending on a high note.

We head home: through the gloss of rain or weight
of snow, or the plum blush of dusk, but always -- home,
always under one sky, our sky. And always one moon
like a silent drum tapping on every rooftop
and every window, of one country -- all of us --
facing the stars
hope -- a new constellation
waiting for us to map it,
waiting for us to name it -- together

2009: Black Bean and Monterey Jack Casserole
2010: Orange-Soy Tofu
2011: Warm Garlicky Lentil and Potato Salad
2012: Simple Creamy Tomato Soup

Roasted Cauliflower and Turnip Soup with Crispy Turnip Leaves

20 minutes preparation time
approximately 60 minutes cooking time

This soup is made with the vegetables of the season, roasted first to give the soup that rich, earthy flavor. We liked this combination, but feel free to substitute the vegetables that you find at the market on your next visit, carrots, greens, sweet potatoes would all make interesting additions.

There is no need to peel the potatoes or turnips. Just scrub them well and trim off the turnip stem and roots.

1 small cauliflower, washed and cut into florets
6 medium turnips with their greens
4 large potatoes, scrubbed and cubed
drizzle of olive oil
salt and pepper
1 head of garlic
1 quart vegetable stock
1 tablespoon cider vinegar

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Cut the turnip greens off of the turnips. Set aside. Scrub the turnip bulbs and cut them into cubes. Put them in one side of a baking dish. Put the cubed potatoes on the other side. Drizzle olive oil over the vegetables, sprinkle on some salt and pepper, and mix.

Cut the top off the head of garlic so that the tops of the individual cloves inside are exposed. Wrap the head tightly in foil and put it in the pan with the vegetables.

In another pan, toss the cauliflower florets with olive oil, salt, and pepper. Roast the vegetables, stirring them a few times, until they are browned and tender. The cauliflower will be done first, after 20-30 minutes, depending on the size of the florets. The potatoes and turnips will take a bit longer. The garlic will likely be last and will be done when the individual cloves are lightly brown and soft enough to spread.

When the vegetables have finished roasting, remove them from the oven and add them to a soup pot. If necessary, add a few splashes of water to the pan to loosen any caramelized bits. Add that water to the soup pot. Slip the garlic cloves out of their skins and add them to the pot, too. Add the vegetable stock and enough water to cover the vegetables. Bring to a simmer and until the vegetables are very soft, about 20 minutes.

Taste and add salt and pepper. Purée with an immersion blender.

While the soup is cooking, arrange the turnip greens on a baking sheet and toss them with olive oil and a sprinkle of salt. Toast them until they are crisp and dark, but not black. Watch them carefully; they should take 7-10 minutes.

Serve the soup in individual bowls and add a turnip leaf or two to the bowl for garnish.

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Galette des Rois

Happy New Year! I hope you all had some great times with family and friends over the past couple of weeks.

Our holidays were fun but hectic. My sister, niece, nephew, mother-in-law, and uncle were all in town and having them all here felt so right, so like the crazy big Christmas of my dreams. We had loads of big family dinners, played a thousand games, drank enough wine to make Bacchus proud, and ate whatever we wanted.

My heart is full, but my body is tired. Getting back into a routine for school and work at the end of this week was a challenge. At least the weekend is here again so we can all get a bit more rest.

My stomach feels the most worn out. Three out of five of us have gotten some type of stomach malady. I'm not sure if it's a virus or a case of too-much-holiday, but either way, there has been a peak in the consumption of crackers, rice, and toast.

But before the 12 days of Christmas are finished, we (at least those of us whose stomachs are up to the task) will squeeze in one more treat: the Galette des Rois for Three Kings Day, the day that marks the official end of the holiday season.

The tradition is to bake a bean inside the cake. When serving the cake, the youngest person in the room goes under the table and dictates who gets each piece. The person who gets the bean becomes king for a day.

This recipe came to me from my friend Andrea and it has now become a family tradition. It was the first thing I cooked on our new stove at the end of our kitchen renovation so it has a special place in our family lore now.

Now that the holidays are officially over for us, we can turn to some healthier eating, at least long enough to counteract the effects of the holiday excess.

2010: Pear and Almond Cake
2011: Spiced Roasted Pears
2012: Mom's Apple Butter

 

Galette des Rois

 

Although this cake is not difficult to make, it requires advance planning because the filling has to freeze overnight before baking. I have given precise measurements for the sizes of the filling and the pastry, but you don't need to be too tied to them. The idea is just that the filling will be small enough to fit inside the pastry and the bottom sheet of pastry should be big enough to pull over the top piece of pastry and crimped.

When you assemble the cake, make sure to mark the spot subtly so that you (and only you) know where the bean is. That way, if you don't serve the entire cake at once, you can be sure that someone will still get to be king.

30 minutes preparation time, plus overnight to freeze the filling and 30 minutes to chill
1 hour baking time
Serves 8-10

6 tablespoons butter, softened
7 ounces almond paste
3 large eggs, divided
2 teaspoons freshly grated lemon zest
2 teaspoons flour
1 14-ounce package puff pastry
1 bean

Put the butter, almond paste, 2 of the eggs, lemon zest, and flour in the bowl of a mixer. Mix on low speed until the ingredients begin to blend together. Turn the mixer up to medium and mix until the ingredients cream together into a consistent texture, although it will not be completely smooth because there will be small lumps from the almond paste.

Lay a sheet of parchment orwax  paper on a baking sheet. Turn the mixture onto the paper and with a rubber spatula, spread it into an 8-inch round circle. Cover with another sheet of parchment or wax paper and freeze overnight. If the puff pastry is frozen, put it in the refrigerator now so that it can overnight.

When you are ready to bake the cake, remove the pastry from the packaging and unfold it onto a lightly floured counter. Cut it in half. Roll half on the floured counter until all sides measure at least 10 inches.Trim the pastry so that a 9-inch circle remains. Save the scraps. Transfer the pastry to a baking sheet with sides or a jelly roll pan.

Remove the filling from the freezer, unwrap it, and lay it on top of the puff pastry. Place a bean on top of the filling.

Roll out the second piece of pastry into a 9-inch circle. Transfer it to the top of the filling. Gently pull the bottom piece of pastry up over the top piece and crimp it tightly together. Make a subtle mark where the bean is so that you know where it is. You want as tight a seal as possible so that the filling doesn't leak out as it cooks. Cut a design, such as a crown, and lay it on top of the cake. Use the decoration to mark the spot where the bean is. I like to point the longest prong of the crown towards the bean.

Mix together the remaining egg and a spoonful of water. Brush the cake lightly with the egg glaze (you won't need it all). Put the cake back into the refrigerator to chill for about half an hour.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. After the cake has chilled, bake it at 400 degrees for 45 minutes. If the top starts to get too dark, cover the cake with foil. After 45 minutes, with the cake still in the oven, reduce the temperature to 350 and bake for another 15 minutes. The pastry on top should be golden brown and dry to the touch.

When the cake has finished baking, let it cool for a few minutes before cutting into it.

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